bethb's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- my voice is a cacophony So would you like to hear a story in the history of beth? Mebbe i will tell you the one i like to call, "Why beth can't sing in front of people. Not even 'happy friggin' birthday'" Once upon a time, when i was in 7th grade, in a time called 'the 80's',i was in choir. Now, this wasn't a difficult choir to get into. Basically, you showed up-you sang. and all it got you was two assemblies and out of doing two book reports during homeroom, per semester. At the time, i fancied myself to be an alto. So that's where i was. i had been there since 4th grade and stuff seemed to be going all right so why rock the boat y'know? So, one day, we were singing a classic...something terribly challenging...something like "Santa and his Helicopter". We're all singing our little pre-pubescent (with the exception of Jon Cohen. he was an early bloomer) hearts out when mid 'whirlie whirlie whirlie up in the sky" Mrs. Messina, the choir teacher, stopped playing her piano. Now, Mrs. Messina was (is?) a mammoth house of a woman. barely contained by the piano she sat behind; a woman who pronounced 'singing' like SingGing. Two seperate words. Sing and then Ging. I can't stress the importance of that enough. Sing Ging. So the entire choir is faltering off, as her hands appear on the top of the piano, and she heaves herself up to stare down the choir. Frightened children sort-of continue on "Santa's....got...a..helicooopter....now......he...ccaan fly?" but generally trail off.. Messina's eyes dart around the room as she raised her arm, pointer finger extended and shook her bejewled hand right at me....me in the back row....me....mousey, quiet, you should be friggin' happy i'm here you dumb lady me! and says "YOU! DON"T SING" of course everyone cranes their necks back to see who she was talking to. ME. that's fucking who. then she swoops her arms up in that grand conductor 'all together now' fashion and plops her hide down on her trembling piano bench and picks up the song. I was stunned. What did i do? was i really so horrific that i alone could be pin pointed out from above the voices of about 50 other jr. high schoolers? I quit choir after that...i had to remain until the winter concert, but i didn't return for the spring. Didn't matter. i started playing field hockey, which, actually, i do miss...anyone wanna start a DC field hockey league? Annnnnnnnnnnd my friends, that is why, if you see me within earshot of people. I will most likely be lip synching. as to not have to subject anyone else to the horrific cacophony of noise that is my voice. 19:05:31 - 2000-05-17 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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