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bethb's Diaryland Diary

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the final score: anemia-2, beth b. -0. couldn't give blood. not enough iron. at least this nurse didn't yell at me. she was very sweet.

i thought i was better. and by better, i mean 'plowed through 2 boxes of kleenex last week'. i thought i maybe was edging away from platform of breaking into tears over everything. i though for sure i got it all out sunday as i ready the post from the safety of my bed and read about all the beautiful people who are lost or missing or dead. it's not fair. each day that goes on, it gets more personal. my mom's friend who stopped on the 42nd. floor for some coffee in the first tower when the first plan hit, but got out in time but only looked back once. after seeing three people jump, she couldn't look again. the beautiful little boy from the DC area who was going to california for a study trip that national geographic put together. his classmates and parents . i wasn't that good of a student. i don't have 3 gorgeous blonde children. i don't have a family that depends on me.i don't risk my life for other humans. i don't do anything, really, that helps to benefit this world, and yet here i am.

it's not right.

8:31 a.m. - 2001-10-21

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