bethb's Diaryland Diary

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Feeling overwhelmed

It's hard to see how much you've done right or even well when the first thing your eyes and heart see are how very much you've lost or aren't doing.
I'm hesitant to look back at how I was feeling at the end of 2014 because I probably felt the same way about going into 2015.
This is going to be my year! I'm going to floss every day and not be a disgusting pig and run a thousand miles and get a great new job and learn to knit a pair of socks and travel somewhere fun and totally get in shape and read a book a week and finally learn how to achieve a smoky eye and make art every day!

When in reality I rarely floss, my apartment looks like a war zone, I've run exactly once this ENTIRE year, I'm still at the same old job but now with a new boss and it's awkward and it sucks (that's another story) and I traveled to two places this year and one of them was for a family wedding and it was awful with a capital A, and well, I've re-subscribed to Shape magazine, and I've started a few books and maybe finished 6 (I know, I'm the worst), and outside of mascara and a red lip pretty much abandoned make-up because I just can't do it, and art.....well...I am still upset about losing my studio in April.
I am going to try to make 2016 the year of doing something about it. Taking proactive steps to fix things. Like getting a new job, being realistic about projects and finishing them and stopping the spiral before hitting bottom and feeling overwhelmed

10:05 a.m. - 2015-12-21

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